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Come Meet My Soul – the Journey, Part 4 of 4

16 Sunday Dec 2012

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I have to laugh a little at myself because it seems whenever I try to do a ‘mini series’ of themed posts in here I lose my weekly blogging pace.  Exhibit A:  my review of the Four Agreements book last year.  Normally this glorious Sunday blogging ritual is something I look forward to…waking up with a smile after sleeping in a bit.  Sitting down at the keyboard either totally ready and knowing what I’m going to blog about…or with zero idea and just seeing what happens when I type.  I love both scenarios actually!  There’s no need for a safety net in here.  Last weekend was recovery from mental exhaustion, and I just needed to truly chill and not do much of anything except get in the gym and enjoy some downtime and cooking. 

So, it’s good to be back here after an unexpected vacay.  It’s a steely-grey, damp Sunday morning.  Silence save for a few occasional cars out on the main road.  Funny how I can tell what the weather is like before I even look out my window every morning.  The cars sound totally different on wet asphalt vs dry.

Back in mid November I started this 4-part “come meet my soul” mini series.  Joy.  Passion.  Kindness.  Today’s theme is PEACE.

How wonderfully fitting that this peace post falls right smack in the holiday season.  It’s what we all wish for and pray for.  Sometimes it’s a hard struggle out there to imagine a world with peace.  This horrific school shooting in Connecticut late last week makes me want to cry and throw up all at the same time.  I teared up when I saw my cousin’s Facebook post that “….more parents have lost their children today.”  Those words were a kick in the stomach.  My cousin and her husband lost their son in a drowning accident in 2004.  On Father’s Day of all days.  He would have turned 10 this year.  And I saw a list of the shooting victims and their birth dates.  Children born in 2006 (2006) lost their lives.  I just don’t have any words for this.

I don’t know if we’ll ever get to a state of world peace.  But I think however we get there it’s a personal responsibility…it starts with each of us as individuals.  Every day.  What choices do we make from what life puts before us each day?  Do we go through the motions unconsciously, or perhaps with a state of anger?  Or of calm?  Of happiness?  With a hunger to change things for the better?  And how?

I’m told I have a calm, grounded presence in times of stress…and to me that is peace personified.  Honestly I am much better at ‘holding’ that stance at work rather than outside of work.  But again, I’m human.  Sometimes I get jittery and rattled when my confidence is challenged.  I think we all do though.  I’m trying to continue to practice breathing through problems…and asking for help and support when I need it. Being vulnerable when I need to be – and it’s OK.  This is far easier to do when I’m feeling – well – at peace.  Rested, fed, getting enough exercise…all the basics that fuel the best Me.  If I’m tired, cranky or had a tough day at work I’ve got very little left in my reserves to deal with much more.  Lately that’s how it’s been.  Man, actually for the last month work has been nutso.  Normally this time of year is the slow winding down before the holidays.  This year it’s been nothing but madness.  But madness in a good way.  This team continues to blow me away with how collaborative and helpful and respectful we are to one another while fighting the fiercest of fires.  It’s a true ensemble cast without backstabbing or finger-pointing or not saying ‘that’s not my job,’ when we all need to put other priorities aside and focus on fixing the most burning ones.  When this work engagement wraps up for me next month (by design), they’re going to be a tough act to follow.

So peace to me means being calm.  Bringing a state of serenity and grace to those around me.  Which in turn brings warmth…and love.

And this weekend has been a glorious self-refueling to get back to that center of peace.  Sleep.  Exercise. Excitement…I finally broke the 30 minute barrier in my 5000m rowing machine sessions – hit 29:26 – woohoo!  And celebrating by making a pot of hot and sour soup from scratch…topped with fresh crabmeat!  Getting the Christmas tree decorated and figuring out what last-minute shopping I still need to do and vowing not to be in the mall on Christmas Eve like I was last year, eesh.  I love weekends where there’s a list of stuff to do but no rush to do them.  This is the time I need to mentally reset.  I have 3 social evening events in the city this week and need to figure out how to make more hours in the day, ha ha!  Work is still going to be intense with longer hours required of all of us. 

So today is a day of recharging and refreshing.  Gearing up for a whirlwind, glorious week ahead.  Book club at a wine cafe.  A concert at Benaroya Hall – what a treasured jewel right smack in the heart of downtown Seattle.  And a major birthday celebration for a wonderful friend of mine to cap off the week in style.  I simply can’t wait!

The Active Equinox

23 Sunday Sep 2012

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Welcome, Autumn!  And welcome Spring to my southern hemisphere readers!  The season changes are such a sensuous time of the year. Along with obvious changes like the longer shadows during the day, a slight chill in the air and a longing to put away the sandals and rock my fall shoes and boots, I truly believe – if you breathe really deeply into the Universe – that you can FEEL the change.  The vibration shift.  The motions that are perhaps unconscious to us but are all around us.

I remember watching the Cosmos TV series (on PBS) as a young teen.  This was a special Sunday night ritual with my Dad (my Mom didn’t seem too interested in it).  While much of what Carl Sagan talked about was too complex for my young mind to understand, it stirred something within me.  As if to say that seeds were planted – you might not understand everything now, fivenineteen, but your curiosity will grow throughout your life with an ongoing hunger to learn.

One of his segments talked about motion – how even if we appear to be still, we are not.  I may be standing still on the ground, but the ground is not motionless.  The Earth is turning on its axis.  The Earth is revolving around the Sun.  Our solar system is cruising along in some random outer arm of our galaxy (or perhaps in and out of galaxy arms – some say that is the reason for our planet’s Ice Ages)…AND our whole galaxy is whooshing through the universe too!  To where I have no idea.  Or how fast.  All of this is mind-blowing to me when I try to make sense of it all.  And believe me, Carl Sagan explained those last few sentences far better and far more eloquently than I ever could.

So, I made some of my own tiny motions into the Universe this weekend – both mentally and physically.  My resume was overdue for an update, and it felt good to sit for a few hours and really focus on capturing my latest work activities.  It’s funny, for as much as I love to write, I sometimes run into writer’s block about my career.  How can it be so hard to summarize my latest accomplishments and job responsibilities into a few short sentences and bullet points?  I’m much better at speaking about it than writing about it, resume-style.  The work I’ve done over the past year and a few months is something I’m so very proud of.  And my team is dynamite – I truly, truly believe that NO ONE ever does it alone and that many helping hands make the load lighter.  This team embraces and breathes this same philosophy as well, and it shows.  It’s not lip service.  It’s something practiced constantly.  I know this work engagement is ending to free me up for my next opportunity (and also for practical reasons, such as the budget for my role runs out later this year), and it’s like stepping off with a leap of faith that the right next step WILL happen.  I’ve been through this cycle a few times over the past 6 years and I feel better taking that next unknown leap now that the job market has improved somewhat compared with the 2009-2010 era.

That was Saturday.  Man it felt so good to just breathe and savor the change of seasons.  The weather has been absolutely beautiful.  Plus I was able to get my car emissions test done on Friday afternoon (part of the requirement to get new license tabs), rather than gobble up part of a cherished Saturday driving a ways out to the site and waiting in line.  Ugh.  It’s a necessary thing to do but the car emission test site is one of those evil vortexes where time slows to a painful crawl.  Same with the oil change places too!

And Sunday I joined my dear friend T and her friend D (whom I’ve met once before) and D’s adorable chocolate Lab, Lucy, to walk in the Walk to End Alzheimer’s Pacific Northwest benefit!  This was an easy, relaxing, two-mile walk along South Lake Union, north of the downtown Seattle core.  This walk raised over $280,000 for Alzheimer’s research!  T, D and I learned in chatting that we had each lost a grandmother to Alzheimer’s, so this was an especially important cause for each of us personally.  T is also on the Seattle board – so proud of her generous donation of time and talent, especially having just started a new (unrelated) full-time job herself! 

Now, if you haven’t been around the South Lake Union area recently, you’re in for quite a wonderful surprise.  The area is transforming.  Beautifully.  Sure, there is some temporary pain, such as crazyass road closures, maze-like swirls of lanes blocked off and general confusion, especially for someone like me who tends to drive past this neighborhood rather than have it as a destination.  I’m so glad today’s Alzheimer’s Walk showed me just how beautiful a transformation this is, and it stirs up my hunger again to someday live and work in Seattle proper, rather than the suburbs where I currently call home.

I was a little bleary and tired when the three of us met up for our carpool (there’s that darn ol’ ‘not a morning person’ flaw again), but by the time we were ready to walk and walking I felt more energized.  The sun was out but not too strong given the time of year, the lake was beautiful, people dressed in purple were everywhere (the color for Alzheimer’s awareness) and it was nice to savor this part of Seattle on foot.  Honestly I tend to just drive and whiz through the South Lake Union area or more recently avoid it all together given all the construction and transformation underway.  So it was fun to see the lake, the Kenmore Air seaplanes taking off and landing and the view of Gasworks Park (my very first apartment after college graduation was just up the hill from it – dumpy apartment but great views – you have to start somewhere!)

On my way home I felt on a roll and made a beeline to my gym (where my trainer, B, is kicking my ass every Wednesday night).  I had made a commitment to get in the gym Sunday nights, but I had a party to go to, so I figured why not get some more gym time in while I’m feeling good and on a roll from a fun but not too-strenuous-walk earlier? 

I think I’m going to be addicted soon to the rowing machine.  What a nice change from the treadmill.  I love how it relaxes tension in the upper back and shoulders.  It just feels like more of a full-body workout than the treadmill, and I truly appreciate B showing me the basics on how to use it, from the resistance settings, the “10 and 2” rocking motion back and forth (as in 2:00 forward and all the way back to 10:00 and so on) to getting your feet placed properly in the grips.  I rowed 2000m (1 mile and 427 yards) in 12 minutes!  My goal is to get up to 5000m at a stretch.  I also did some weight and lunge work, lat pulldowns, plus the somewhat-evil hamstring strengthener using a fitness ball for resistance.  Yep, I think I will be feeling all of this tomorrow for sure.

And I topped off the weekend with a party with my hockey teammates at our co-founder’s soon-to-be-second new donut shop!  It was great to see everyone and share a few laughs and hugs.  I love these guys like brothers and/but know my decision to take this season off is the best one for me.  I was happy that they were open to having me come back next summer season.  It’s never guaranteed – I don’t take that for granted – but it is nice it might be an option for next spring.  It will all depend on where I am at that point and if I really, truly miss the ice and the game of hockey after my break.  I have a feeling I will.

While I appreciated the food (and donuts!) provided at the party, I kept it to just one slice of Canadian bacon pizza and one beer. 

After all, I’m proud of the progress I’m making physically.

Reunited and it feels so good…and so painful

19 Sunday Aug 2012

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Ah yes…there actually ARE muscles in there, way down deep in my core.  And my hamstrings and my pecs…

And I’m still feeling the burn, 3 days after that workout!  Truly hilarious.  Oh wait – it’s not good for me to laugh too hard right now – my abs hurt when I do!

So what’s going on here?  Well, as mentioned last week I am committed to shifting my routine and getting back to basics with physical fitness.  Hockey is going to take a sabbatical and I’m going to use money normally budgeted for league fees and put it toward my kick ass personal trainer, B.

Who, really and truly, kicks my ass.  B first started training me back in 2009 at the gym I’ve belonged to for now nearly nine years.  I’d never worked with a personal trainer before, but I was inspired by my manager at my job at the time, who took the plunge and hired a personal trainer for himself.  And I got to thinking, hmmm…my gym had finished undergoing a major remodel, complete with brand new exercise equipment throughout.  It would be fun to learn how to use it with a professional!  I was in the process of doing Couch to 5K, a running program for beginners and felt on a wee bit of a fitness roll!

Everyone at the gym recommended B.  He’s been training there a long time and is a fixture.  But hardly with his style…no, he is all about variety and creativity with workouts, which is EXACTLY what I need.  I’d seen him working with other clients over the years so I had a general idea of his demeanor.

I enjoyed working out with him so much…we’d meet up Tuesday nights and Sunday late mornings.  Try as he might to get me to join his Sunday morning spinning class I always opted out – it was too early for me on a day of the week I cherish sleeping in.  Never once was his workout for me exactly the same – truly inspiring and impressive.

Then the economy tanked and I was out of a job.  Ah yes, summer 2009…so wonderful with personal accomplishments and yet so damn shitty with the job market.  So while I clung to my gym membership – I truly needed it to keep me sane during those unemployed months – I had to make personal, financial cutbacks and training with B was one of them.  Of course he totally understood – things like this happen all the time.

So last Thursday – after 3 years – we got back to business.  Ironically it was one of the hottest days of the year so far – highs in the mid 90s (36c).  It seemed a little odd to be heading indoors on such a beautiful evening but on the other hand, I was jazzed and motivated to get back to it.  “Let’s Rock & Roll,” as B always says before our workouts!

Planks.  UGH.  I’m wayyyy out of practice doing them, so he had me do some variations on ab crunches to get started.  I also did some step up exercises on a stool so he could gauge my balance on how well I can step without needing to push off with my lower foot.  Sad but true, after age 40 or so we as women can start to lose our sense of balance.  And I have a small handful of stories to totally prove that true – a few female friends/co-workers have taken tumbles on stairs or outside on office steps shortly after turning 40.  I too have had a few klutzy incidents – thankfully most with no witnesses (meaning, at home).

I also did some upper body work (man, that feels great to bust through the neck/shoulder tension after slaving away on a hot laptop all day) and some diagonal lunges with hand weights.  And side moves with kettlebells to target those obliques. Believe me, that hour went fast.  It was intense and I was dripping in sweat by the time we were finished.  What a great feeling!

…Until the next morning.  Oh man I was in agony, but not in a bad way.  Although changing positions while sleeping, getting out of bed and simple things like walking down stairs, sitting down on the – ahem – throne and getting out of my desk chair at work after a bit was excruciating.  I was probably walking around looking like I was severely constipated.  HA!

The plan is for us to train Thursday nights and I’ll get in the gym on my own on Sunday nights and Tuesday nights.  Starting this Tuesday, ha ha.

This weekend was all about FOOD.  Lots of great, glorious food.

One of my cousins is getting married later this fall on Catalina Island.  We had a bridal shower luncheon on Saturday in her honor, hosted by a family friend with a beautiful home in the Queen Anne neighborhood in Seattle.  Such an elegant menu as well…the soup was a chilled puree of tomato, peach, a little chicken stock, cream and fresh tarragon.  It was so unexpected and heavenly and I’m in hot pursuit of the recipe so I can post it for all of you here – simply glorious!  We also had small sandwiches, spinach Quiche, an arugula salad and a trio of small scoops of sorbets for dessert with hot coffee.

And if I thought I’d never be hungry again the next day, I actually was.  I went to visit L (my guy BFF) today, as he had finished designing and printing new business cards for my Silpada jewelry business.  I’m thrilled how the cards turned out and can’t wait for the new batch of accompanying postcards too! 

Lunch was in order and L was in a burger/sports bar mood.  On our way in the car we passed Thai Siam, a longtime, casual and fabulous Thai restaurant in Seattle’s Crown Hill neighborhood, just north of Ballard.  And they were having their annual benefit buffet, so we thought, why not?  An all-you-can-eat buffet of incredible Thai food benefitting local causes (Seattle’s Union Gospel Mission and Cancer Lifeline…that’s a no-brainer!)

My goodness Thai Siam brings back memories.  In the early 1990s when I’d finished college and was just starting out working full-time, eating out was a luxury I craved (I hardly knew how to cook save for mac & cheese and Boboli pizza).  Heck, anything beyond basic rent and utilities (and other basics like pantyhose but that was the era then) seemed a luxury.  But a mutual friend of my roommate’s raved about Thai Siam, and while it is not pricey in the general sense it was a splurge – and well worth it – on my entry-level salary.  And how wonderful to visit it again after 20+ years!  Along with live Thai music and dancing, a spontaneous barbershop quartet grabbed the microphones and sang a few songs, including Happy Birthday to a man celebrating his 21st with his family!  The waiter walked up to him with a smile and asked him, “hey, do you want a beer?”  Before he could answer his mother piped in with a flat-out “NO.”  Hilarious!

I love spontaneous weekends like this.  And I catch my breath that it’s mid August – we hold tight to summer here in Seattle for it’s often too fleeting and brief.  But when the sun shines here, there is nowhere on Earth more beautiful.

Now, where did I put my Motrin?

Shifting

05 Sunday Aug 2012

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Last night I had a really cool flash of inspiration – a catchy title for today’s post.  Now of course I have zero idea what it was so it’ll be “shifting” for now unless something more awesome pops into my head.

It feels like AGES since my last post…but nope, sure enough it’s been a week just like my usual routine.  Which I adore, by the way…fivenineteen’s been such a great outlet and solace for me – and hopefully some entertaining reading for those of you who stumble in here by accident or follow along (thank you and thank you, by the way!!).  I love the slower pace of Sunday…time to mentally recharge, refresh, dream and wonder.

And for the past near week my gut has been both whispering and shouting at me that it’s time to make some changes (no, it’s not the voices in my head).  Starting with hockey.  The game that has changed my life these past nine years – my God, 1/5 of my life!  I’m going to take a sabbatical after our summer season playoffs wrap up – which could be as soon as tonight if we don’t win our game.  I have so many memories of all these years of hockey I could ramble on forever about it (and I have occasionally in here I’m sure). 

Know that feeling when you KNOW what you need to do and then talk about it…and you can’t help but be so happy and excited because it’s the right decision and you sound so goddamn authentic?  I had a great chat at the rink with my team Captain last Monday…and it felt so wonderful to tell him!  I have a ton of respect for him too – he’s fairly young (24) but far beyond his years in leadership and organization.  Hockey is a big time commitment and big financial committment too – believe me, I would never spend as much time or money as I have on hockey if it was not worthwhile to me. 

9 years.  NINE – OK, well almost nine, as it was some time in September or October 2003 that I suited up in brand new hockey gear and took to the ice, joining an adult beginner hockey clinic on a total random whim!  I had absolutely NO idea how much fun I would have, the amazing people I’d meet along the way, and all the crazy experiences of late nights and weird hours (11pm faceoffs on Sunday nights…in the dead of winter?  That soon became ‘normal’ for me.)  The charity games, benefitting our local Ronald McDonald House.  The off the chain tourneys in Vegas…fantastic!  And I had no idea I’d still be doing this all these years!

Along with so many fabulous memories, what hockey has provided for me is the incredible benefit of Sunday night exercise.  I used to stress out on Sunday nights, restless and squirmy on my couch watching TV, or sometimes having dinner at my folks’ house.  I’d stress out about stuff coming up at work mostly.  Skating my ass off Sunday nights broke that spell – so freeing and joyous!  When I’m on the ice nothing else matters.  And getting great exercise with great people, along with the bright lights and cold air at the rink…just an amazing experience.

Now I’m going to continue this glorious tradition of Sunday night exercise…back at my gym!  Which I have not set foot in in…probably a year and a half.  Ridiculous, right?  It’s like flushing money down the toilet every month.  And I’m going to take the money I normally budget for hockey league fees and get back to working out with a personal trainer.  I contacted B, and we’re going to meet later this week to talk about my goals and put together a plan!  I’m so excited!  B trained me for a few months 3 years ago, and I had to pull the plug when my work contract ended. 

That all seems like a long time ago…I was out of work but still in the gym every other day, training for my very first 5K.  And just trying to keep mentally sane through the unemployment.  I was so grateful for hockey during those months too, as I always knew when it was Sunday (because that was usually our game night).  Unemployment was awful in so many ways…and not knowing what day it was when I woke up was bizarre.

So now I will focus on improving my physical fitness.  Nine years ago I was, well, nine years younger and probably 30 pounds slimmer.  I was also skating 3 or 4 times a week, dropping in on various practices and scrimmages.  How the hell did I have the time and energy for that?  Nowadays, skating once a week is about all I can manage, and that’s definitely not enough to maintain fitness or improve my game.  Life is different for me now – I’m busier in different ways, I’m probably not as energetic and it’s harder for me to get home from work and springboard back out the door to a weeknight practice or scrimmage.

Working out at the gym with B will help me tackle the groan of middle age weight gain and improve my muscle tone.  My core is not anywhere near as strong as it used to be – my back hurts if I’m on the ice too long during a shift.  My abs and upper body need work, and I’d sure love to find more of my waistline again!  The plan is to work out with him twice a week, and then work out on my own on those all so important Sunday nights.  Maybe it’s time to get back in the pool or try yoga?

Yes, I guess my life really HAS changed a lot in nine years!  Seven different jobs (I do contracting/consulting work), new friendships, a few romantic relationships, a few 5Ks, the launch of this blog in 2009 and a totally new stretch starting my Silpada jewelry business.  I’m definitely not a slacker!

And yesterday I took a look at the clutter here in the home office.  This room pretty much looks like it’s barfed, as everything from the 3rd bedroom is moved in here while L and I finish up the popcorn ceiling scraping work.  Ugh.  Books piled up everywhere.  It suddenly dawned on me that a lot of these books have been just sitting in my bookcase (and now on the floor) UNREAD!  I haven’t opened a lot of them in 15 or more years…and probably never will!  So I jumped out of my chair and grabbed a few grocery bags.  Voila…35 books off to Goodwill – hurray!!  It’s still cluttered in here, sadly, but at least I made a small dent in it.

Tonight I will head to the rink with a smile…it’s our first playoff game and given it’s single-elimination playoffs, it might be my last time on the ice for a while if we lose.  Whatever happens is what was meant to happen…and either way I’m so excited about the rest of summer and fall and my plans…new adventures await!

Adventurous Weekend Waiting

01 Sunday Jul 2012

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I bet I’m not the only one who sometimes gets a little anxious or jumpy – impatient even – while waiting for something.  Or someone.  I’m a mostly good-natured person, but I find my patience continues to wane the older I get.  Hmmm, I wonder how I’m going to behave when I’m elderly…Lord willing I live that long.

On Saturday I forced myself out of bed a little earlier than usual.  I’m heading out of town for a few days later this week (woohoo…road trip!) and I knew my car was overdue for an oil change.  I also had a spa appointment later that afternoon – hmmm, maintenance time for both my car and me, too funny!  I knew I needed to get the oil change out of the way first thing, otherwise there was a slight danger I’d procrastinate getting it done yet again.  I know very little about cars but I DO know ya gotta change the oil regularly.   Thankfully I use synthetic oil so I only need to change the oil twice a year.

Now, if there ever was an evil vortex where time slows to a painful crawl, it’s at Jiffy Lube.  And no offense to the nice people who work there, for they are very friendly and personable and do their best to get customers taken care of quickly, but for me I’d rather scrub my bathroom floor 10 times with a toothbrush.  I just DREAD waiting for my car to be serviced.  I feel like a complete sitting duck stuck in a frozen moment of time.  And for a while now they have had these windshield repair guys who “piggy back” and inspect each car’s windshield while it’s getting serviced.  I think they are sub-leasers or something like that.  So not only do I have to sit and wait for my car to be serviced, but I now have some other dude trying to sell me on getting the tiny rock dings and chips in my windshield replaced.  It just feels creepy and weird to me.

Typically I bring a magazine from home to pass the time, as the reading material provided is usually not very appealing to me.  This time I’d forgotten, even though I put the latest Marie Claire right smack on my dining room table near my purse so I wouldn’t forget.  Oh well…thank goodness we have phones, right?  I checked out stuff on Facebook, texted a few friends and even immersed myself in some email newsletter reading.  For the last couple of years I’ve been reading and dabbling a little in learning about Arctic/circumpolar issues – climate change, the indigenous peoples, environmental issues…just a tiny taste to intrigue me and dream of a future trip to Svalbard.  I read through the latest University of the Arctic newsletter and mentally escaped from the dreary orange and brown Jiffy Lube waiting room.

Before I knew it, my car was ready to roll!  I’m so glad I saved those newsletters in my email – I’d considered canceling my subscription as I never seem to have time to read them but I definitely won’t now!  I got the car radiator flushed and filled too – they said it was overdue per my car’s guidelines and I figured OK what the hell, couldn’t hurt.  My car is a champ at 13 years old and I know it’s going to continue to need a lot of care to get the most out of it for as long as it’s worth spending the money to do so.  And I remember one of my brothers (the one I bought this car from) telling me, “Take good care of your equipment and it will take good care of you.”  Makes sense!

I called L out of the blue yesterday, probably while out on the road running errands.  I have a new Bluetooth headset so I’ve been calling people a lot from the road to get feedback on the audio quality and volume as I get used to it.  So far I’m very impressed.  And it even announces when I have a new text message and will read it to me!  How cool is this?  I hadn’t heard from L in a while and I figured he was probably super busy with work – which is great!  Turns out he was on business in Chicago and was planning to fly back the next day (today) and asked if I would pick him up at the airport.  We planned on grabbing lunch somewhere and just getting caught up.

Evil time-slows-to-a-painful-crawl-vortex Exhibit B:  The Sea-Tac airport cell phone parking lot.   My God, if there ever was a sign of how times have changed with air travel, this is one of them.  I’m old enough to remember my folks driving me to the airport just to go watch airplanes take off and land – no kidding!  So fun!  And when air travel meant dressing up.  Even my youngest brother at around age 5 was in a suit and adorable little clip-on tie when we’d go visit relatives on the east coast or on family vacations.  This was the late 1970s, by the way!

The last time I was in the cell phone parking lot was…oh man…over a year ago when I was picking up the guy I was dating at the time after he’d been in Australia for two weeks.  What a difference a year and some makes!!  Now here I was – with that issue of Marie Claire I’d forgotten to bring along for the oil change – waiting for my guy BFF’s flight to arrive.  If you have not yet read my post about L and me and how we got reconnected after a gap of several years you really do need to check it out here.

Every woman needs a wonderful, straight male friend in her life.  L is gold to me.  He opens up and shares the most mind-blowing and amazing things about who he is and what’s going on with his life and his passions, dreams and goals.  I feel so honored to be a safe place for him to be able to open up like that.  I know how different men and women are…as women, we thrive on deep, emotional connections and revealing a lot with each other right away.  With men it’s very different…the warrior is wired to instinctively conceal, not reveal.  ‘Tis true!

One of the things I love about L is how so spontaneous he is.  He helps me lighten up (I tend to be a planner and envy those who just fly by the seat of their pants).  When he asked if I was hungry I said YES and we talked about where to grab a late lunch as I sped us back up the freeway toward Seattle.  As I was parking my car he noticed my extremely dusty dashboard and playfully wrote “dust me, bitch” and his name.  Hilarious!  OK, OK, I get the point…the car dashboard is dusty!

We ended up at the Hale’s Ales Pub in Seattle.  It’s right in between the Fremont and Ballard neighborhoods.  And WOW, the memories here run deep.  I’d not been to this place since probably the late 1990s.  I was living in the Magnolia neighborhood and working downtown, commuting by bus.  Oh how I miss those days sometimes.  Anyway, a lot of my co-workers became pretty tight friends back then, and we were always hungry for a new spot to go out to eat and drink.  We pretty much LIVED at Hale’s once we discovered it.  And now fast forward 15+ years, here I was with L.  It was just how I remembered it!

And I must have been hungrier than I thought…L chose a Reuben sandwich with Jo Jo’s, and I had a small cup of smoked salmon clam chowder (LOVE this stuff – L grabbed an extra spoon and tried some too), a burger and a small Caesar salad.  Polished off with a damn good Bloody Mary for me and a Holsch beer for L.  I sure won’t need a full dinner tonight!

L told me all about his Chicago trip – seeing his parents, client visits, potential new business, etc.  He also wants to get back to work scraping the popcorn ceiling in my townhouse – a hellacious, messy, laborious project if there ever was.  He’s a saint for helping me.  He wants to get back in the gym regularly and even asked me, “so when are you going to get back in shape, fivenineteen?  You’re a beautiful woman.”  I blushed and said thank you. Just to put this in context, L and I first met about 8 years ago when I was, well, 8 years younger and about 35 lbs slimmer, after a 6-month journey of lots of walking to drop weight.  Long story, but life goes on and the pounds creep up.  Playing hockey once a week does not do the trick for me.

Maybe I’ll make a vow to myself to start hitting the gym again this summer while it’s their slower season.  Oh wait…it IS summer…it’s July 1!  No more excuses.

Sleeping in Anticipation

15 Sunday Apr 2012

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I seem to write a lot about sleeping in here.  Part of that is because my usual blogging day here, Sunday, is synonymous with SLEEP.  Sleeping in.  Glorious, glorious sleep.  Without a sound sleep I’m a wreck…well, usually I can get through on caffeine and adrenaline and fake it the next day, but the next night – WHAMMO.  Gotta get those zzzzs.   And weekends are essential to recharge.

When I was in college, the first class of the day was not calculus, art history or philosophy but choir my freshman, sophomore and junior years.  At 8am, sharp.  And I could have been up late studying or partying until 3am the night prior yet bounced out of bed no problem on just a few hours sleep, ready to sing!  What an incredible way to start the day.  Truly energized me.  And where in hell did I find all that energy to get through college life on 5 or 6 hours of sleep a night (or less)?  Oh – duh – I was 19.

Spring seems to finally be springing around here.  I can open the townhouse windows for some fresh air and not worry about freezing to death or rain coming in, and even went to work a couple of times last week without a coat.  Ooops, we had rain later in the afternoon but it didn’t matter.  Here in the Seattle area we don’t let a little rain ruin our day.

I met D for a walk yesterday…back to Juanita Bay Park in Kirkland for another look at the protected wetlands along Lake Washington like we did a few weeks ago.  The view of the lake shore from the boardwalk is endlessly fascinating…every time we visit something is different.  Yesterday it was clear spring had sprung – birds were chirping loudly all around us in the trees and turtles covered the logs floating just under the lake surface.  I felt the sun radiating down and through me and was glad I had plopped on a light running cap and some sunscreen before heading out.  A couple of hard-core photographers were out with their impressive cameras. Huge, long lenses on tripods all wrapped in camouflage fabric.  That’s when you know it’s good…even the pros are out!  We chatted briefly with them and they pointed out a bald eagle high up in a tree.  Wow my distance vision is not so great, but as I focused more I could see a white head far, far up.

We walked on, determined to get a good workout.  Time for some hills!  And the West of Market neighborhood in Kirkland delivers.  Along with some steep, winding hills you get major real estate eye candy.  Beautiful homes with fantastic views of the lake.  Most all of the older summer home cabins have long been torn down and replaced with modern homes, but there are still a couple of adorable holdouts.  This is the neighborhood where you can get wonderfully lost, almost in a dizzy, dreamlike state, just blocks from the anchor of Market Street.  I love it.

I went over to L’s last night to watch hockey and hang out.  Sausage hot dogs with the works, chips and a couple of beers with my guy BFF.  Love it.  And yes, L is a huge Chicago Blackhawks fan and the Stanley Cup Playoffs are under way.  So I had to be silly and annoying and arrive at his house in a Vancouver Canucks t-shirt. ‘Cause those are my boys!! The Vancouver/Chicago rivalry is just a few years old but rumbling up into something fierce.  And it just won’t be the playoffs without a Vancouver/Chicago matchup again this year.  It just won’t.  Last night it was Chicago and Phoenix.  Chicago won in OT.  This is gonna be an intense series alright!

So…anticipation.  I woke up today with a smile on my face and wondered.  Spring is coming…and there’s so much to look forward to.  Hockey – the Canucks gotta win it tonight in LA or they are going to be painfully behind in a best of 7 series.  Losing those first two games at home?  Pathetic, boys…play your game already!!  And even more hockey – I’ve got a late playoff game tonight in my own league.  Double elimination and we’ve already lost one.  So let’s bring it, team!! 

I thought about my job and how in a few weeks I’ll know for sure if my consulting engagement will be extended out further into the summer and early fall.  Right now I’m mobilizing, for officially I’m wrapping up end of June by design.  Keeping my network up to date and soon it will be time to refresh my resume.  This group has been one of the strongest and healthiest teams I’ve ever worked shoulder to shoulder with.  And if my time with them is winding down, well, the bar is set high and this will be a tough act to follow.  But so many new doors will open!

Later this month I’m going to attend a 2 day workshop on understanding men and their behavior.  My friend T raved about it and I can’t wait!  Stay tuned for more posts on that. 

I’m going to embark on a 5-day cleanse of sorts, with a pack of meal-replacement shakes, snack bars and vitamin supplements I purchased last month at a seminar my new friend M lead.  I have an extra pack of the meal-replacement mix (yummy French vanilla and gluten-free) and I’ve tried a few times mixing up a glass for a breakfast or lunch replacement.  But something in me has been reluctant to do the 5-day cleanse.  I think about all of the food recipes I’ve posted in here…can I do a 3 liquid meals a day for 5 days straight?  I love the textures and flavors of food.  This cleanse means 5 days of chocolate, strawberry and vanilla beverages in steady rotation.  And yet it’s only FIVE DAYS.  What am I waiting for?  In early 2010 I kicked a nasty, 25-year Diet Coke addiction cold turkey with zero problems.  So I can do this too, right?

Ahhh…I know what the blocker is.  I’m worried about my energy level.  M did comment that energy levels can temporarily drop with some people as their body resets with the low glycemic beverages.  I’m worried I’ll be lethargic and not able to skate my best for my team.  So there it is…I’ll start the cleanse after my own team’s playoffs are done.

And maybe it’s time to get back to regular exercising again.  Skating once a week does not do it.  D and I want to get out on walks more often and maybe that’s the motivation I need – doing this with a friend – to get me back in shape and feeling more like myself when I look in the mirror.  My body does respond well to regular, brisk walking.  And I’m in dire need of some new spring and summer clothes and would love to feel more comfortable shopping like I did when I was slimmer a few years ago.  The times when you know your size and you know it’s going to fit and look well.  Someday I’ll be back there again. 

I finally got my damn passport in the mail for renewal.  So funny how the procedures change decade to decade.  Don’t laugh, but I got new pictures taken 7 or 8 months ago.  MONTHS.  And I’ve either been too busy or too frustrated trying to find the forms to fill out.  I have to laugh at myself because I’m pretty resourceful finding things online.  Somehow the passport renewal was a stumper.  BUT I cracked the code, filled out the forms, mailed in my check and old passport and we’re on our way.

Nothing like a fresh, new passport to open a whole world (no pun intended) of anticipation.