So much has changed in the last couple weeks since my last post.  Head spinning.  Mind blowing.

Everything changes.  Two words right there pretty much sum up life, right?  Gotta ride things out…embrace it even.  Sometimes you want to jump for joy…sometimes shout FUCK at the top of your lungs.  There, that feels better.

3 days after my 47th birthday I got canned from my job.  Yep, with no warning.  That’s how this company rolls.  Wouldn’t even let me back in the building to pee.  My agency rep had to pack up my desk for me and bring me all of my stuff in a box while I waited outside.  14 months of wonderful work, reduced to a heap of desk knickknacks, a jam-packed Filofax and a laptop soon to be wiped clean.

I drove about a quarter mile in a daze and pulled into a random office parking lot.  And I made a ton of phone calls.  Just feeling numb.  Not knowing why things happened and not really caring.  It’s nothing personal, right?  They say it’s budget cuts but I wonder.   Thankfully I have a few years of this type of work under my belt to know this is NOT typically how consultants wrap up their engagements.  Meaning, most clients will give you a couple of weeks or even a month’s notice that things will be winding down.  That’s the healthy, courteous, normal way to operate.  Yes, italics used intentionally.

This same thing happened to me at this very same company back in 2007.  Yep, it took me all these years to even reconsider going back there.  Things seemed different this most recent time around.  I truly enjoyed my work and I loved my colleagues.  Great personalities and senses of humor.  I received great feedback on my work throughout and will always remember that.  Canning me and treating me like an animal in the process, or so they try?  Nope, it doesn’t shape me and it doesn’t break me.  I know who I am!

So…that means we’re back to the job of finding a job!  Thankfully this is something I’m pretty good at.  I’ve met lots of people who tell me “wow, fivenineteen, I’ve been at the same job for 15 years…I wouldn’t know the first thing about updating my resume or networking like you do.” Well, I didn’t think “wow, when I grow up I want to do short-term consulting engagements!” But that’s how my career path has advanced over the past eight years and it’s truly transformed me into a much more savvy, confident person.

And thankfully it’s not 2009 and 2010 anymore.  The very bottom of the recession, at least from my viewpoint.  In fact, being out of work was what inspired this blog…way back in 2009!  Check the really old dusty archives in here to see the rocks rolling out of my head come to life in my first few posts.

Meanwhile, we’re in the last month – home stretch – of the Lean Eating for Women program I joined last July.  And getting oh so close to FORTY POUNDS (18.1 kg) of weight loss, people!  WOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!  Dancing around in the 36-37 lb range this week.  I love seeing the looks on people’s faces when they haven’t seen me in a while!  Even people like my hair colorist and stylist who I see maybe every other month or so.  They are truly stunned at how much I’ve changed!  And I feel GREAT!

So, I documented my weight loss with a 3 hour photoshoot yesterday.  A gloriously sunny day with hardly any wind…so not typical for this time of year in the Seattle area!  The photoshoot is actually part of the Lean Eating process…they recommend booking a professional but it’s not necessary at all.  Yeah, it felt a little (OK a LOT) self-indulgent splurging on a photoshoot being out of work but you know what?  Sometimes self-investment is exactly what we need.  And I have no regrets for sure!

I was really nervous but G did a great job making me feel relaxed and comfortable.  And she showed me a few of the shots from her camera as we went along, so I had an idea how they were turning out.  Not bad!!  Got my hair colored and cut that morning as well, so I felt cleaned up and pretty.  Picked a few outfits that really felt like “me” – jeans, a nice top and really great jewelry.  And we did some shots in workout gear…in one I’m posing with a 35 lb weight plate to symbolize my weight loss.  Holy crap, picking that thing up and carrying it around…it was HEAVY.  And how eerily scary to think that was what I used to carry around me on my body.  Every day.  No more.

What else is new around here?  Oh…the men.  Geez, the men…how tangled the webs we weave or whatever that saying is. There’s been someone sort of in my life since about February or so.  Don’t really want to go into more than that in here.  Had a couple dates with someone else recently, but while it was fun there just wasn’t any spark or glimmer that there might be a spark.  And J, the guy I dated most of last year has suddenly resurfaced, by sending me messages on Facebook and saying he misses me.  What the hell?  He says when he told his best friend that he broke up with me his friend punched him.

I said you know what, I’ve always liked that friend of yours.  Give him a high five from me.